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11 Day Migraine

Hi

Welcome back to my life!

I hope you all had a great weekend.  I actually did, it was my son's birthday weekend.  My oldest turned 7.  It was a very nice weekend for the most part.  I can't remember most of it to be quite honest, no I was not drunk or on any un-prescribed drugs.  I have been dealing with a migraine sense August 12th.  I don't think anybody that came over my house noticed much of a difference I was talking and trying my best to act normal.  There were moments I would zone out and had no idea what was going on but for the most part I pushed through. 

It started August 12th as we were at the park catching pokemons. lol Yes we play Pokemon Go.  My husband got me hooked on that game.  I started feeling some vertigo and a mild migraine nothing major.  I took my meds and didn't think much of it.  The next day I felt worse. I felt like I couldn't get out of bed.  The light bothered me, the noise I just did not want to get out of bed.  I was nauseous my body hurt I just felt like shit.  And to top it all off I started my period.  Thank you mother nature.  I tried sleeping and more meds to see if it would go away!  By Monday my mother was taking us to the circus.  I couldn't let this migraine ruin such occasion so I injected my self with medication.  Which is what I need to do if my migraine gets really bad.  I felt that 3 days with pain is bad enough!!! I took a nap and felt a bit better but the pain was not all the way gone.  The vertigo was still there.  Then the head pressure and face numbness came back.  The nausea on top of the cramping and lower back pain from my period lets not forget that too.  I had to spend a whole week trying to manage my migraines while being a stay at home mom, but most importantly... hiding it from everybody.   After so many years of being in pain and not feeling well.  You get tired of telling people you feel like shit all the time. First you feel tired of having to explain to people how you feel, just so they can get an idea of how you feel. Second you get tired of defending how shitty you really feel because some people don't believe you.  Third some times we feel like if we don't talk about it or if we don'/t face it our selves maybe it will go away as well.  Being in internal physical pain that cannot be seen is exhausting.  It is exhausting to have to explain your self every time. Explain why a doctor can't find a cure, explain why you can't be fixed, why you can't have a normal life, why you are the way you are.  As if we had picked this way of life.

And sometimes we give up so much we don't even want to go to the doctor.  I went 11 days with a migraine because I saw no point of calling my doctor.  It has happened before, it will happen again, why should I even bother?  But I saw my kids asking me to play and me not being able to get out of the bed and feeling like such a bad mother that I made the call this morning.  So I went to the doctor and they injected 6 shots on the back of my head to stop my pain.  I had never had that done before.  It was weird, but the pain went away in a few minutes.  I then told the doctor I wish I would of called last week. I feel brand new! I almost gave up, with out knowing that the answer was on my next move.  I was just refusing to make the move. I had to remind myself that my life struggle will be my condition and that it is okay to feel like shit.   But always remember that it won't last forever.

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